Thursday, June 17, 2010

Missed Life Lessons...

I was always a very aware child. My earliest memory after I describe it, I was informed by my mom that I was in fact a year in a half old at the time. I became a Christian at 2... standing between my mothers knees. At 4 years old, I could read, write, and navigate my directionally challenged great grandmother through a large city in order to go pick up my mom from work... and, thanks to my uncle Mark I learned to climb trees, play video games, and how to sneak down Grandma and Grandpa's stairs without the floor creaking when I was 2 or 3... I remember my childhood very vividly, and I grew up as though my life was this epic adventure movie.. where clearly I am the beautiful yet completely capable protagonist.

And yet, somehow I find myself realizing I have missed some apparently key life lessons... Leaving the question to be begged: What happened?!

Let me share some of these with you...

Life Lesson #1: Insurance and Bills.
I have never been good with math, but I still always got A's in my math classes because I worked my tail off... So, the other day I get a medical bill summary, clearly stating in multiple places "This is not a bill" ... (Ok, then why did you send this to me?!...) what caught my attention was the serious problem with the math.
Cost of visit: $240
Insurance coverage: $182
Your cost: $0
And, I never got the official bill either...... That clearly leaves $58 that just disappeared!.... What in the world?.. Now I am paranoid that I will end up with some magically appearing balance of accrued medical visits bill... I still cannot figure out how the insurance math is so different then basic math!... Ok, so I haven't learned this life lesson yet, but if you know, please share it with me so I CAN learn how this works!

Life Lesson #2: Faulty Appliances.
A while ago a friend and I made dinner and dessert for us and a couple of our guy friends. After we were done the stove would not turn off... and in fact the broiler turned on making the entire stove molten hot. Initially we assumed some how the self cleaner had been turned on, but the door was not locked, nor was there any indication of the self cleaner being on. So, in our attempt to be capable women we were going to slide the stove out, but seeing as it was too hot to touch, that quickly got ruled out as a possibility. One of our guy friends had stepped out of the room for a phone call, while the other watched me be a capable woman (?!).. In my attempt to have everything under control I devised a plan....
Pull the bottom drawer of the stove out, and... unplug it! Which was a great idea.. to my friend and I. She stood over me reminding me to avoid touching the stove with my completely extended arm as I reached to the back of the stove and worked the plug out of the socket.... It worked great until my thumb touched one of the prongs and I got electrocuted, which caused me to yelp, and jump... but carefully so I didn't sear my entire arm on the stove, then just laid there for a moment as my entire arm went numb. Eventually I unplugged the stove and saved the world.... Only to then have our friend who stepped out return and inform me I should have just switched the breaker... Doh!.. (Did I mention my older brother's an electrician.. and I SHOULD have know that?.... whoopsie!)

Life Lesson #3: Cooking.
In my family, I am the second child of 4. I have an older brother who is married with 3 children of his own (being an aunt is AWESOME!), and I have a younger younger brother and sister. Growing up, my older brother and I (unbenounced to my poor parents) made every meal a chance to see who could eat more... So, my mom made LOTS of food. Subsequently I learned to cook making, well... LOTS of food. Currently, when I am at home and cooking, if my brother and his family come over, that means cooking for at least 10 people. No big deal, until I moved away and had to cook for just one.... The first year I lived alone I cannot even begin to fathom the amount of food I threw away because it would get bad before I could eat it. I mean, if you are making macaroni (a staple in my family growing up) you make the ENTIRE family size box..... And then, proceed to eat nasty left over macaroni for a WEEK (or more)! Why?... Because, mom always made the whole box, so of course you make the whole box... Not ever realizing that mom was cooking for 10... you are now cooking for a TENTH of that (plus the fact that you no longer are trying to out eat your brothers...). Soon though, soon you figure out, you are not actually saving money when you buy perishable food items in bulk because you end up throwing more than half of it away before you can eat it... It has only taken me almost 2 years, but I have begun to learn to cook based on the size of the crowd I am cooking for instead of habits learned growing up. 

I am a slow learner sometimes haha! I am sure I will be adding to these missed life lessons as time goes on...


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